So here I am again, it’s midnight where I am at, and that just makes more room for thinking, and overthinking things. Though, I always do that anyways, I just realized. What I want to say, at the moment, is… that I want to be loved. I know, I know, this is one of the most used sentences in the world of teenagers, but it’s true.
I think that this is why my self confidence sometimes land on zeroo, and why I always feel like I’m not enough. If someone had just once said they wanted me - that doesn’t count if they’re drunk or stoned - I guess things would have been different. Because, I don’t think I am an ugly girl, none of us are, no one ever will be. We’re all beautiful. But to the point; I am the kind of girl that makes out with a guy on a party, then spend a week sulking over the fact that he asked for my number and never texted or called. Even though I’m aware of that he was drunk, I still do it. I wish he’d meant it when he said he’d call me, or that giving him my number wasn’t for nothing.
This has happened to me three times now, and I’m getting tired of it. I only make out with guys on parties, and guys always seem to friendzone me. Does anyone feel the same about this crap? I’m sick of it, anyways, of always being the girl watching her friends texting guys or meeting up with the guy they made out with on that party last weekend. It feels like crap. Yuck.
So, yeah, I don’t know if I even had a point in all this, but I got it out of my head, and I’m kind of hoping someone can relate. Relating is awesome, support is awesome, people a sometimes AWESOME.
So, goodnight world. Tomorrow’s a new day and all that…